Fosterburg, Marion County, Illinois

May 19^th, 1862

My Dear Companion

Your father came from Patoka this evening and brought your letter dated 10^th inst., which I was most thankful to receive and to know that your health is improving.  I am glad that you had received that letter of mine with those ? for I was afraid that you would never get it.  I feel rather disheartened to hear that you are so close to the enemy and to hear of you losing your Major.  I am glad to hear the Foster Moon is with his Company again and hope that William Arnold will be with you by the time this reaches you.

Just 9 months today since you started for the army.  Oh what a stay has this been and but little prospect of a return.  If you had only volunteered for one year, then that time would soon be here, but my heart sickens at the thought 3 long years and you, far away in enemy country, with them shooting at you, my dearest by far than all else on this earth.  Your letter rather disheartened me tonight and I am wondering if you are lying on a bloody battle field tonight.  I pray not, but I feel in distress.  It is bed time, good night.

Tuesday morning 20^th

We have very cool and cloudy weather for several days.  This morning it is raining.  We need rain very bad.  I intended to finish this letter and go to the Burgh today if it does not rain too bad.  Miss Colburn sends you some papers to read and requests that you should distribute them as you think best.  I dipped over one hundred buckets of water out of the cellar yesterday and lowered it about one inch.  I have set my task to that each day till it is all out.  Georges babe has been sick for several days but it is getting better.  I went to meeting Sunday and saw Mr. Jones wife.  She has a daughter with her.  Her husband is in the army and was in the battle in Pea Ridge.  I like her appearance very well.

I believe I never gave you any answer to the question about the State Constitution.  I never read it.  I never heard it mentioned by any of the neighbors.  I saw it in the Salem paper.  You must be aware that nothing interests me but the war news.  I had wrote to Mr. and Mrs. Young to pay me a visit as soon as he was able.

Everybody is teasing me for corn.  I refused to sell, then they want to borrow.  Will Lambert came here yesterday and said if I would lend him 6 bushels he would pay me a bushel and a half for one bushel in the fall, or pay the money.  I thought of the time we had seen and could not refuse him.  John Bell wants 15 bushels.  George thinks I have about four hundred bushels yet.  Tell me what you think I had better do about it.  Corn is worth 25 cents per bushel.  I will have plenty of wheat for bread.

I am sorry to tell that Noah was at Fathers Sunday night and stayed for breakfast Monday morning.  I have a good talking laid up for Elizabeth.  It will do no good, but she may remember it some day.  I had hoped that we might have one brother-in-law that we could see some comfort with, but it wont be him.  I tell her to ask him if he loves honey and if he loves to ride in a sleigh.  George says the last time he saw Noahs sleigh, it was riding down the East fork.

I have been in the orchard and found 12 apples on the tree at the end of the hen house and thirty on the one that had some last year.

You urge me again for that promise.  I gave you the same answer to it in my last letter to you.  I can tell you that I have had my satisfaction on that subject.  When you come home there will be time enough for such things to be talked of.  I could promise you that, but it would be bitterly against my own will.  I hope you will cease for the present.

I believe that you could manage to come home as well as some there do.  Snider of Patoka is home now.  I have something to tell you that I don’t think proper to put on paper.  I have never heard him say any more about his wife.  I don’t see him now.  I guess he has business at home now as his wife is .…. I don’t know why them ------- was so short.  I guess they need oiling.  I sent some more in my last to you. ?

Oh dear me.  My mother has been here and told me that the wedding is to be in two or three weeks.  It hurts me worse than anything that has happened since you left home.  He may make here a good companion.  I hope he will.  If I had ever mistrusted such a thing I would have tried to kept off.  John W. White from Washington county has been writing her every since she was there and I had read some of the letters and thought that would break it off with Noah.  She told me once that Noah said that his father married Elizabeth and his brother William married Elizabeth, and he was going to see two Elizabeths.  So I must swallow all and say nothing.

The library door key is broke.  I have never tried there nor at the shop, yet maybe some day I will, then I will tell you.

Tell me if a Quartermaster does have to go into battle.  If they do not have to go, I hope and trust for the sake of me and your dear children, that you may be behind with the provision train.  I had rather hear of you being left behind than to hear of you being on picket or in battle.  If not, I hope you will not go.

John Wilson, Eliza’s John, was wounded at Shiloh and died last week.  He was brought home and buried.  We are all well and hope this will find you in the best of health.  We have had some rain but not enough to wet the clods.

Diora went to Daves today and brought me Youngs coat.  Miss Colburn says that Ellen Nichols tells her that you wrote a long letter to Dave and said Amos Moon was in the guard house for robbing an old woman.  I don’t know why he did not send me his letter when he sent mine.  He never takes any trouble for me to see his letters.  Sometimes I send for them.  It is time for supper, so come to supper William.

Your loving wife,

Mary Smith